


Say goodnight, our first goodbye

by Trinity (Yelena)



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Angst, Dubious Consent due to Alcohol, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, First Kiss, First Time, Loss of Virginity, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-22
Updated: 2015-03-12
Packaged: 2018-03-14 13:01:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3411572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yelena/pseuds/Trinity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zuko and Katara had been in love since the day they were trapped together in Ba Sing Se. She didn’t get over his betrayal and she doesn’t trust him, but a little alcohol will make her lose control of her feelings.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I really hope you wnjoy it because I wrote the smut scene about three times until I got it right.

The first time Zuko really noticed Katara was actually the day they first met. She was much more beautiful and wild than any fire bender, as untouchable as the sky, as fierce as a storm. Of course, back in that time she was the enemy and he was a crazy prince who wanted her new friend dead. But it never stopped him from thinking about how pretty she was.

Many years passed since that day and now they were sort of friends. Zuko already had his first group hug two days ago which meant he was an official member of the “Gaang”. However, he didn't feel Katara truly trusted him. Inside the cavern they called home, she was dancing with Aang and Toph around a camp fire Zuko made, while Sokka was playing some cheerful and meaningless song. Sat in a corner with a cup of hot tea, all the prince could see was the way Katara's body moved, how beautiful her face was by the low light, how happy and relaxed she looked. 

"Hey Zuko, you're not dancing!" Sokka teased before starting another song. The other three stopped the fun and pulled a very confused Zuko near the fire, where they made him try some moves. Katara was already drunk enough to not mind dancing with him, which made him very uncomfortable and even a little shy. His world stopped while the girl danced around him, touched his body, grabbed his hands and made him move along with her. Next thing Zuko knew was that he had a cup of wine in his hands and was happily dancing with the woman of his dreams and everyone was very drunk. He was probably the worst dancer in the world, but the alcohol made his head spin in a way that made him feel terrific. Soon he took off his boot so it wouldn’t squeeze his feet, and then nothing could stop his fun.

Hours later, there was no more music playing and everyone was laying down on the floor. A smiling Toph was almost laying over Sokka, who was playing with her hair and whispering something just for her to hear. Katara had her head resting over Zuko's shoulder and they were holding hands. Aang was almost asleep using her thighs as a pillow and holding Momo as if he was a teddy bear. 

"I should probably get some water to help us dealing with our hungover tomorrow." Katara said in a low voice. "Wanna help me?" She asked looking up to Zuko. He smiled. "Of course." 

Aang just moved a little so Katara could get up and went back to his asleep state. Zuko followed her without even put his boot on, all the way to the river. She hadn't brought any vessels, so he was wondering how she would carry the water. 

"I won’t." She stated as if she could read his mind.

"What?"

"You were thinking out loud." The brunette girl explained and they both laughed because they were still a little drunk. "I never had a hungover, so tomorrow I'll wake up before anyone does and then I'll pick up some water." Suddenly she stopped walking when they arrived the river's side and turned to stare at Zuko's eyes. "I noticed the way you were looking at me the whole night. Thought we could use some time alone."

Zuko laughed sloppily, because how perspicuous could that woman be? Without any second thoughts, he put one hand on the back of her neck and the other on her waist and pulled her in for a kiss. He had fantasized about kissing her before, the taste of her lips and how soft would she feel on her arms, but it was nothing like reality. It was gentle and calm, just like water flowing through a spout. He could feel the soft scent of her skin as she put her hands on his back and pulled him closer. He could feel her breasts pressed against his chest and the tickle of her loose hair on his face when a breeze blew. 

“Do you want me?” She asked quietly when they stopped kissing, as if she needed him to say what she already knew.

“Of course I do.” He answered just before kissing her again. 

This time she used her tongue to feel his mouth, and he used his to taste every little bit of hers. Without letting her hand go off his body, Katara traced divergent paths from his back to his belt and held the tissue between her fingers. She hesitated at first, but when Zuko put his hand under her top, she untied the bend. With a soft caressing the girl felt the skin under his kimono with shaking hands, from his abs to his chest and finally his arms, making that piece of clothing fall to the ground. 

“I’m not sure what I’m doing…” She confessed and Zuko smiled.

“Just relax.” He said when untying the know that held her top to her body. The thin tissue slipped open in seconds, laying over her left shoulder and revealing her right breast, making her blush and look down. Zuko didn’t touch her with his hands when he threw her top to the floor. Instead, he pulled her close once more and felt her soft skin against his chest. He could feel her heart beating fast when they kissed again, but even shaking her grip was strong on his hair. He could feel himself hardening inside his pants and she could feel warmth and wetness between her thighs. 

The prince asked to water bender to lay down and followed her as she did. He bit her ear very softly just before kissing her neck, his hands wandering over her body and making her breath difficult. When his hands found the waistband of her skirt, he pulled the piece down very slowly. Katara arched herself to make it easier for him, and soon all she had left was her underwear. Her heart raced inside her chest, fearing what would come next. There’s no need to say she had never done it before and the idea of letting a man go inside her was scaring. But she wanted it do badly and for such a long time she woudn’t dare to stop the hands that undressed her completely. With her hands shaking more than even before, she pulled Zuko’s pants and underwear down but didn’t dare to look anywhere but his eyes. She wanted to see him and feel him, but she was ashamed of her unexperienced touch.

“Are you really sure about that?” He asked when he saw the look on her face.

“I want you.” She whispered so quietly the soft breeze almost took her words away.

As they kissed once more, Zuko touched her inner thigh with his fingertips. He slowly approached her pelvis, feeling the wet pleasure of her. Katara tensed and her lips stopped moving against his, but she didn’t ask him to stop. He rubbed her very gently just to let her know more about that king of feeling. The girl took a deep breath and started kissing him again, her chest moving faster as he changed the rhythm of his touch. He tried slipping a finger inside that cave and her body took it so easily it made him a little anxious. After a few minutes doing his best to make her as relaxed as possible, he removed his finger and positioned himself to get inside her. She opened her legs wide to give him all the space he needed, with her knees flexed, her feet firm to the ground and her hands holding on to his arms.

The feeling was nothing like anything she felt before. It was different from what she did to herself in the middle of the night, when she couldn’t sleep and found herself thinking about Zuko. And it was different from what he did to her a few seconds earlier. She wanted to be there with him more than anything in the world, but she couldn’t help being so nervous. As soon as she felt the first inch of his hardness inside her, she contract her walls like her body was trying to tell her to change her mind. It was painful and uncomfortable, and he stopped as soon as he noticed.

“Relax.” He said as he kissed her jaw and caressed her cheek. “Just take a deep breath and don’t think about anything.”

She nodded, closed her eyes and took a very deep breath. It was impossible to keep her mind clear, so she thought about how good it felt when he touched her, how gentle he was and how much he tried to please her. Soon her muscles relaxed and Zuko could slide himself inside and this time she didn’t feel any pain. It was a little uncomfortable and she felt stretched, but it wasn’t bad at all. 

“You okay?”

“I’m fine. Just do it.” She said with all the self-assurance she could and he didn’t waste another second. 

At first he made slow and short movements, waiting for her to get used to it. Then he tried longer movements, getting out of her almost completely just to push himself back as far as he could. Katara bit her lower lip so she wouldn’t make a sound, but it got more difficult as he sped up. Zuko help both her thighs firmly and brought them next to his waist, making her cross her ankles behind him. It gave him a better angle and for her it felt almost too much. She wasn’t sure of what changed, but suddenly she felt him hit a spot that made her open her mouth and tighten the grip on his arms. The boy noticed and hit that spot over and over again, and it was so good she couldn’t even describe it. 

She didn’t want to moan because she honestly thought it was ridiculous, but at some point she couldn’t avoid it. A high pitched vowel came out of her mouth, very quick and very loud, and for Zuko it sounded like a signal that he was doing the right thing. After that he moved faster and harder, a few husky moans leaving his own mouth as Katara’s voice filled the night air. The girl scratched the boy’s back and arched her back, trying to let her sensations go. Zuko kissed her nipples as he pushed himself inside her and pulled her closer to him, making both of their hearts race and their breath go away. 

Katara reached her orgasm with a scream, just a second after Zuko growled and let his seed fill her. He kept moving for a few moments, slower at every push until he stopped completely. She caressed his back while he rested his head over her chest, playing lazily with her long hair. Their breath were heavy, their bodies sweat and their minds a little confused, but they were both happy. Zuko slid out of her body and laid by her side, pulling her for a very slow kiss. She rested her head over his shoulder and they held each other fondly without saying a word.

"I wanted to do that since the day I first saw you." The boy confessed after a long silence and Katara giggled, being drunk enough not to remember or consider the circumstances of their first encounter.

"Sorry, I just wanted to do this since you started watching me dance a few hours ago." She lied. Actually she never had considered the possibility of having sex with Zuko (or, at least, she never thought it would actually happen), but she had started looking at him differently since they were traped togheter in Ba Sing Se. After figuring out that he wasn't exactly mean, she realized that maybe, just maybe, she could fall for him. It sounded silly, but the bender actually liked the idea of a good and fair Prince Zuko. Seeing him fight beside Azula kind of broke her heart. Katara and Aang belonged together and everyone knew that, but part of her wanted to have at least one moment with Zuko. Yes, they made it but they would be nothing but weird friends after the sunrise.

In fact, it was really weird when the sun rose and Katara woke up, still naked and still holding Zuko. It took several moments to remember what happened and, once she did, her heart was filled with guilt. The brunette girl swore she would never drink again as she dressed up as quickly as she could before going back to the cavern. Everyone was still sleeping, so it was easy to get a water vessel without being noticed. 

Zuko was still sleeping in the same position when Katara came back, which made her kind of angry. She gathered his clothes and angrily threw them over his head.

"WHAT THE HELL?" He screeched and then took the clothes off his face. The first thing he saw was Katara bending a large amount of water from the river to a vessel that wasn't there before. His head was throbbing. "Good morning?" 

"How can you sleep so much? What if someone came looking for us? We shouldn’t even have slept here! I don't know about you, but I wouldn't feel very comfortable if my brother saw me naked with a guy."

"Sorry... but can you talk a little bit lower? Headache." Without any warning, Katara threw a large ball of water on him. "What's the matter with you?” He screamed and regretted it at the very moment. “Did I say another girl's name in my sleep or what?" He huffed, still very annoyed while dressing.

Suddenly Katara stopped everything and took a deep breath. It would be easier if she had just controlled herself and just said what happened was a one night stand. But no, she lost her mind and now she would have to tell him the truth or he would never stop asking. And he had to stop talking as soon as possible, because no one could ever know what happened there.

"I can't look at your face without remembering everything you have done in the past." The water bender picked up the vessel and started walking away, but Zuko held her arm. 

"What are you saying? You told me you had forgiven me and it was in the past. Then last night we had the most amazing sex ever and now this? Am I supposed to understand or what?"

"I'm sorry, Zuko, but that's the truth." She got rid of his hand and continued walking. "I tried to just look forward, I really did, but I can't." She said without stop.

Zuko was speechless. He just walked behind her until they were back in the cavern. Soon everyone was awake and talking happily about the night before, but Zuko and Katara didn't exchange a word. They didn't even look each other in the eyes and Katara got really mad when Toph teased her about dancing with Zuko. 

Later when they where flying in Appa's back, Zuko sat quietly as far from Katara as he could. She was talking to Aang and they were laughing, and it was too much for the fire bender to handle. Watching this made him understand everything though. He had said to Katara he wanted to have sex with her since the day they first met... Since he day he destroyed her village. And Aang... He chased the Avatar everywhere for years and all this time Katara was hating Zuko and getting closer to Aang. For a brief moment the prince dared to think there could be some sort of competition for Katara's heart, but he has lost the war even before the first battle and there was nothing to do about it.

When they finally arrived to their next camping site it was dark already. Everyone was working and Zuko decided to be brave and talk to Katara. He needed her to know he understood what was going on. He needed to do something so they wouldn't ignore each other forever, so she wouldn’t hate him forever. When she left to pick up some wood for a fire, he saw his chance.

"Katara, wait!" Zuko called a little bit too loud. He was about grab her arm to stop her, but he controlled himself and just touched her shoulder. She stopped. "Last night..." He continued in a low voice as soon as she turned to face him. "Last night I forgot to mention the way that I feel... And the way that I'll remember this."

"Oh, really?" Katara said with all the sarcasm she could. Good one, Zuko, you started the worst way ever. He mentally slapped himself. "And how is that, Zuko? How do you feel? Because I feel like I cheated on Aang even though we aren't exactly together. I feel like I betrayed all of my people, everyone from the Water Tribe, everyone who suffered from this ridiculous war and your great hunt for the Avatar." She looked angry but she also had tears in her eyes, however she wouldn't let him see her crying. She was more angry than sad, but the sadness was enough to kill her inside. "I feel like crap, Zuko. Last night was a mistake and it won't /ever/ happen again. Do you understand me?"

"I feel sorry for all of your suffering. I feel sorry that so many people suffered because of this war and I feel sorry for the many times I was the cause of this suffering. But I also feel that all of this brought me to you, Katara." He tried approaching her, but she stepped back. "The first time I ever felt that it wasn't my destiny to be mean was the day you first told me about your mother. We're much more alike than any of us could ever imagine and... I love you. I have loved for a very long time, I feel I could really be happy by your side and I'd make everything to make you happy too."

Zuko tried approaching again and this time Katara allowed him to hold her hand. Every word made her less angry. She just felt sad. Very sad. The bender squeezed his hands and felt like holding him tight, but she didn't. She lowered her head, staring at a random spot on the ground and felt his grip tighten.

"You know we'll never be together. Ever again." She finally said after a long time of silence.

"I know. You'd feel too guilty and I would never be able to make it up for you... For all I've done."

"You say it like I'd never forgive you." Katara finally hugged Zuko, held him tight like he would disappear into thin air if she let him go. "You know that I already did."

Zuko held her as tight as he could, for he knew this could be the last time. "Forgiving doesn't mean forgetting. You said you can't look at me and not remember what I've done and it will probably never change. No one would do it different in your place and that's okay." He said as he stroked her hair fondly. 

"You said you forgot to mention the way that you'll remember this."

"I'll remember last night like the only night I ever had with the woman I love. And I'll remember this hug like the last time I ever touched my soul mate because I already hurt you so much we can’t ever be together. But in a distant future I'll look at you, a very old and very happy Katara, and I'll remember I did the right thing by letting you go without a fight."

A single tear left Katara's eye when she kissed Zuko. They both knew that would be their last kiss and it hurt so much it couldn't last much longer. "Goodnight, Zuko." She said between his lips before she walked away. Before they could see each other crying.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aang and Katara have been together for four months, but she wants someone else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made my bff cry with the previous chapter, so I decided she deserved a happy ending. Sorry Ana, I love you <3

“Are you breaking up with me?” Aang’s voice echoed through the room and reached Katara’s ears. Just them she felt the reality of the facts. She was faced a wall to avoid the look in his eyes, to avoid seeing his pain. It was painful for her too, but she had to do it.

“I told you, we don’t work together.” She put her arms around her own body and looked down. 

“We saved the world together, how can you say that?”

Katara didn’t answer. They worked just fine as friends, but she couldn’t say it. She just couldn’t. Why didn’t Aang see they weren’t meant to be a couple?

“Katara…” He called and reached to touch her arm, but she retracted. “Look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t love me.”

She took a deep breath, then another, and another. There was a tear waiting for permission to leave her eye, but she didn’t let it go. She tightened the grip on her own arms and walked to the other side of the room just to be as away from Aang as possible.

“I can’t.” She finally answered. “I do love you, but that’s not why we’re breaking up.”

“Why, then? Don’t you think you owe me an answer?”

“Because you left!” She said a little too loud and turned around to face him. This time she couldn’t hold that single tear but it didn’t care. “You left for three weeks and I didn’t miss you at all.” For a moment she thought saying that was mean, but it didn’t stop her. “I spent these weeks thinking about you but not for a second I wished you were here and...”

“Oh, c’mon!” Aang interrupted her and threw his hands in the air. “We had that fight just before I left, it’s not that awkward you didn’t miss me. I confess being by myself was good for a few days, but it doesn’t mean I don’t wanna be with you.”

“I has nothing to do with the fight, I didn’t miss you ’cause…” She couldn’t say it. It was too mean, for both of them.

“Because what, Katara?” He pushed. “I swear I’ll leave this room right now if you want me to, but the least you can do is explain.” 

“Please, don’t make me say it…”

“You have to!” He yelled.

“Because I don’t think I love you more than I love Sokka, or Toph, any of our friends!” She yelled back, but instantly regretted. She could have included Zuko’s name to the list, but it would be a lie. I was true she couldn’t picture her future self with Aang, as an old married couple with children, but there was more. Four months passed since that night in the beach and she never forgot what the prince made her feel when he held her in his arms.

For the first time since they met, Katara saw tears in Aang’s eyes and knew it was because of her. They fought a lot in the past months, both of them said terrible things when their blood boiled, but she never made him cry before. Part of her wanted to hold him and tell him not to be upset, but she knew better.

“Aang, I’m sorry…” She begged biting her lower lip as she tried not to cry with him.

“You really thing we’re not meant to be a couple, don’t you?” 

“Sorry…” It was like she didn’t know any other word and it made her feel very stupid. 

Aang grabbed his staff over the desk, put his bag across his body and walked to the door. He stopped just before leaving and faced Katara. He opened his mouth like he was going to say something, but it was nothing more to be said; so he left. The waterbender sat on the floor and embraced her own knees, letting herself cry with her face hidden in her arms. Next day would be impossible to deal with and she’s need all her strength do survive, but in that very moment she allowed herself a brief moment of weakness.

It took two months to life get back to normal. Katara focused on her work more than ever and Aang spent this time with Sokka in the Fire Nation colonies. He’d go back to the Fire Nation for a while, but he mostly visited Zuko and avoided Katara. They didn’t talk much and all she knew about him was because she asked Sokka how was he doing. The news didn’t change much: The Avatar was always busy, solving problems, saving the world and stuff like that. He didn’t talk about Katara, he didn’t ask about her, he didn’t even want to see her. It made her very worried and she wondered if it would be better if she didn’t break up. 

After more than sixty days, what a surprise it was to see him again. Katara was in the Fire Nation Royal Palace’s garden when she sighed Appa in the sky. The bison landed just in front of her and Aang jumped to the ground but he didn’t look around to see if he was alone or not. Instead, he looked up to Appa’s back and grabbed a package someone threw to him. A very happy Ty Lee showed herself and Katara’s jaw dropped.

“Should I get the sleeping bags too?” She asked Aang just before noticing they weren’t alone. “Oh, hello Katara!” She waved with that huge smile she always had.

“H… Hello.” Katara greeted back, wishing there was a way to know if it was real life.

Aang finally turned to face her and blushed. 

“No, we won’t need it.” He said to Ty Lee, even though he couldn’t take his eyes off Katara. “Hi… I’d shake hands, but…” He looked to the package in his hands and gave her a shy smile. 

“Oh! Right… Need any help?” Katara reached to take the package, but Aang didn’t let her.

“That’s ok, it’s not heavy.” He looked at Ty Lee again, but she wasn’t visible anymore. “Ty Lee, c’mon!” He called.

Ty Lee jumped to the ground with a movement that remembered clearly that she used to live in a circus. Both of them said goodbye to Appa and entered the Palace, leaving a very astonished Katara behind.

“Are they together?” Katara asked Appa as soon as she couldn’t see them anymore. The bison made a confused sound and laid on the floor. She took it as a yes.

A few hours later was back to her room, drying her hair in front of a mirror and still thinking about what the hell happened earlier. She wasn’t jealous or anything, but it was just too weird. First, he spent two months away and didn’t even sent a letter to say he was still alive. Then he showed with a new girlfriend. Not any girlfriend, but Ty Lee! Katara knew she wasn’t a villain and was actually doing a great job as a Kyoshi Warrior, but one never forgets when their chi is blocked. 

“Knock-knock.” A male voice calling from behind her. Through the mirror she saw Zuko standing by the threshold, smirking a her. “The door was open… May I come in?”

Katara nodded and he approached. She put the towel aside and turned to face him, her back against the mirror and her hair soaking her blouse. 

“Did you see Aang? He’s here, in the Palace.” Zuko started, obviously taking care not to say the wrong thing.

“Yeah, I was in the garden when he and Ty Lee arrived.” She crossed her arms over her chest and shook her shoulders as if it wasn’t a big deal.

“Are you ok with that? I mean, you guys broke up and he vanished into thin air after that…” Katara rose an eyebrow and Zuko gasped. “Oh! Right… Sorry.”

“It’s weird because she used to be our enemy and I didn’t really had the chance to know the “new Ty Lee”” She drew quotation marks in the air, then crossed her arms again. “but not knowing how Aang was doing worried me and now I know he’s fine. Still trying to digest the information, though.” 

“Glad you feel that way, because we’ll all have dinner together in an hour.” Zuko pointed the door behind him with a thumb. 

“I’ll be there.” Katara said quietly and neither of them moved. She studied his face carefully and remembered how the sight of him used to scare her to death. He changed so much it wasn’t any absurd to believe Ty Lee had changed to. 

“Why are you smiling like that?” The Fire Lord asked, visibly troubled. Katara approached and touched his scar fondly, still smiling even though she didn’t know exactly when did her lips moved.

“You were so damn wrong that night.” She kissed his marked skin and he flinched a little.

“What night? That night? I thought you wanted to pretend it never happened…” He was very confused and his eyes tried to find an interesting spot in the wall because Katara was looking at him, and she was smiling and it was uncomfortable. She was so close he could hold her and it made his heart race, but he didn’t move.

“No, the night after it. When you said I’d never be able to look at you and not think about the past you. You changed so much that past just doesn’t seem real.”

“Do you mean it?”

“I regret every single day I spent pretending nothing happened between us.” She confessed aloud for the first time.

“Why did you walk away, then?” Zuko took all his courage to touch her face and take her wet hair off her face. 

“Because I thought you were right. Back then, I didn’t know I could trust you with my life and I was angry with myself because I was weak and couldn’t say no to you. I thought I had forgiven you but I didn’t. If I truly knew who you really are, I would never walk away.”

“You are the most confused and messed up woman I ever met. And I grew up with Azula.” He said with a sassy smile.

They both remained in silence for a while, staring and smiling at each other until they couldn’t handle it anymore. They laughed so loud they cried a little. Katara’s belly hurted badly, yet she couldn’t stop laugh. And neither did Zuko. It was probably the first time of his life he laughed like that, and the joke wasn’t that good. 

“I was trying to be cute, how can you compare me with Azula?” Katara said as soon as she could breathe again, but she was still laughing.

“Sorry… Fire Nation humor, I think.” Zuko wasn’t laughing anymore, but he still had a grin on his face. “But you were saying…” He put a hand on Katara’s waist and pulled her closer. The heat of his body made her stop laughing, so she stared into his eyes and smiled as if she knew all his secrets. “If you had your mind in its place, would we be together?” 

“My head is in its place now.” She said with both arms around his neck, her lips almost touching his. “Why do you think I couldn’t picture myself with someone else? It was your fault.”

It was enough to make Zuko tangle his fingers on her hair and kiss her lips the way did such a long time ago. Katara did the same and kissed him deep; as it was the last thing she’d do in her life. He still tasted the same and his lips still felt the same against hers. It was like the past four months never happened, like they had been together since forever. Nothing in the world could feel more right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LOVE ME BACK, ANA, PLZZZZZZZ

**Author's Note:**

> Don't forget to give me a feedback: kudos or comments would be really nice ;)


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